I've been living in the miserable no man's land of regret these past days. It has not been pretty... so today I went for an extra long run to clear my head. As I was jogging/walking on a long, flat road many a thought popped into my head. Thought I would share a few...
First, on this long flat road were many walkers and runners, and some old fella's that were more putters than anything else. As I passed some of my fellow exerciser's I realized that the road represented the time-line of my life. And my companion travelers were sorta like the mistakes I have made along the path of life. Some were far behind me, some were like the persnickety speed walker that I would pass, then she would catch up, then I would pass her again. I finally gave up my recovery walking to get her behind me once and for all.
Some of the people were far ahead of me, which represented future mistakes. I couldn't make them out quite yet, but realized, life is full of mistakes and I would need to eventually pass them as well.
Some are in the past, some are sticking with me a little longer than I would like ( speed walker lady with your matching velor suit and perfectly coiffed ponytail that swung back and forth just so ) . And unavoidably, some are ahead of me.
While each mistake/trial/runner is a different shape and size, I need to pass them and leave them behind me. Running back to repeatedly circle around the people/mistakes I have already passed, will not get me to where I need to be. Sometimes, I need to press forward as hard and as fast as I can to get the opposition ( i.e. annoying competition ) behind me. I also need to keep my head up and face the upcoming mistakes, head on.
I need to truly embrace The Atonement and move forward in my life. Stop looking back and keep on running forward, no matter how many other mistakes I have left in my past, or may face in the future.
The second thought came to me as I trudged up the hill going around The Provo Temple. At the bottom of the hill, I saw many missionaries running down the hill as fast as they could. Other people were doing the same with a look of victory on their red and sweaty faces. I kept on trudging up and up.
You know, many times we pass people as they are running down the hill. They look so pleased with themselves and seem to be running at their peak. We do not see the struggle it took for them to get to the top of the hill. I forget most people had to march up one side of the hill, possibly going rather slow as I do, in order to be in the position to run alllll the way down the other side of the hill at top speed. I usually see people running down the hill and compare myself while I am working my way up the hill and wonder why I can't seem to compete.
We all have uphill battles and most likely wish life was all downhill, in a weird sort of way. The thrill can only come if I pay the price it takes to get to the top of the hill. I too get to the top of that old hill, pause and take a deep breath, then run my legs off while getting my best speed of the day. It is exhilarating to have such an excellent time for a good mile or so. It is the only part of my run where I truly feel fast and well trained.
So, I'm not going to look back ( as much as I usually do ) and I am going to enjoy the work it takes to get to the top of the hill, so it can all go down hill from there.
Be Grateful!
First, on this long flat road were many walkers and runners, and some old fella's that were more putters than anything else. As I passed some of my fellow exerciser's I realized that the road represented the time-line of my life. And my companion travelers were sorta like the mistakes I have made along the path of life. Some were far behind me, some were like the persnickety speed walker that I would pass, then she would catch up, then I would pass her again. I finally gave up my recovery walking to get her behind me once and for all.
Some of the people were far ahead of me, which represented future mistakes. I couldn't make them out quite yet, but realized, life is full of mistakes and I would need to eventually pass them as well.
Some are in the past, some are sticking with me a little longer than I would like ( speed walker lady with your matching velor suit and perfectly coiffed ponytail that swung back and forth just so ) . And unavoidably, some are ahead of me.
While each mistake/trial/runner is a different shape and size, I need to pass them and leave them behind me. Running back to repeatedly circle around the people/mistakes I have already passed, will not get me to where I need to be. Sometimes, I need to press forward as hard and as fast as I can to get the opposition ( i.e. annoying competition ) behind me. I also need to keep my head up and face the upcoming mistakes, head on.
I need to truly embrace The Atonement and move forward in my life. Stop looking back and keep on running forward, no matter how many other mistakes I have left in my past, or may face in the future.
The second thought came to me as I trudged up the hill going around The Provo Temple. At the bottom of the hill, I saw many missionaries running down the hill as fast as they could. Other people were doing the same with a look of victory on their red and sweaty faces. I kept on trudging up and up.
You know, many times we pass people as they are running down the hill. They look so pleased with themselves and seem to be running at their peak. We do not see the struggle it took for them to get to the top of the hill. I forget most people had to march up one side of the hill, possibly going rather slow as I do, in order to be in the position to run alllll the way down the other side of the hill at top speed. I usually see people running down the hill and compare myself while I am working my way up the hill and wonder why I can't seem to compete.
We all have uphill battles and most likely wish life was all downhill, in a weird sort of way. The thrill can only come if I pay the price it takes to get to the top of the hill. I too get to the top of that old hill, pause and take a deep breath, then run my legs off while getting my best speed of the day. It is exhilarating to have such an excellent time for a good mile or so. It is the only part of my run where I truly feel fast and well trained.
So, I'm not going to look back ( as much as I usually do ) and I am going to enjoy the work it takes to get to the top of the hill, so it can all go down hill from there.
Be Grateful!
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